Loud & Clear, May 27 2009
I guess I can start this with the most exciting portions of my past week. Friday while kicked back writing a letter to Heather, I was disturbed by an officer coming up the stairs. I seen he had a pipe chase key in his hand to shut off the water to the toilet. This is to keep us from flushing contraband. Well, I knew right away, shake down time. When I seen him look towards my end of the run. Well just great! Then when he opened my pipe chase I uttered, “man what the fuck?”. To which his response was, “special shake down”, meaning that the higher ranks sent them to my cell due to some form of information they have received. So I was stripped out and taken to a legal booth cage, then stripped out again by a rank. They then stood there looking at me until the metal detector chair could be rolled down the hall. It is a chair that you sit in and it detects if there is any kind of metal object on you. Well, I am just in boxer shorts when I left my cell. So the only way that I could have had something is if it was ‘inside’ of me. That was the whole point of the chair. Well I sit in the chair. Nothing! I put my face on the platform, to detect anything in my mouth. Still nothing. Well they put me back in the cage and come back and at the same time commissary officer was asking me about my ice cream, as we got commissary on Friday. She wanted to know if I wanted it in the booth or to credit my account, as if they put it in my cell, it could melt. I look at the rank and I can just tell by the amount of officers, I ain’t going back to my cell. So I say, “what’s up?” he said, “got to make another trip!” so I ask, “medical?” he replied in the affirmative. So I just told the lady to put it in my cell. I got stripped out again and then off to medical I go. They x-rayed me twice! Once while laying down and once while standing up, to see if I had anything ‘inside’ of me.
An inmate here had a cell phone up his ass & the chair didn’t detect it, but the x-ray of course did. This is why they started using the x-ray machine. Now after the x-ray’s get processed they hang them up and the rank and nurse are standing there debating why they couldn’t find anything in me. I stated, “Look, I ain’t about to stick nothing up my ass. Nothing is worth that much to keep!”. This of course brought a round of giggles and smirks from the officers. The nurse then asks me, “so what do you got?” I said, “I ain’t got shit! If I did I wouldn’t hide it up my ass, ya’ll ain’t about to have me out here pulling nothing out of my ass pointing and giggling at me.” Well after all that they finally let me go back to my cell. They also x-rayed all my property. They have this machine here that is like an airport screen-er that has a belt fed system. So back to my cell I go to unpack all my stuff and well, I didn’t until today, so my cell looked like a tornado hit it. 🙂 These people was really convinced I had something. Maybe it was just random. Inmates have hidden things inside them for ages. It is called “keestering” it. Hey, to each his own, but homie don’t play that! As for the x-ray, I don’t consider it to be really out of line. I don’t like the x-rays, as I don’t want to be exposed to that. The nurse told me it is harmless. I somehow doubt that medical x-ray’s don’t add up to some harmful amount. Anyways. A prison does have to maintain security. So I can understand it. But when they do it all the time, that is something else. I have only been x-rayed twice though. But I never been caught with anything ‘in’
me, so I really don’t think it’s fair they go that route. You can read about the guy that got caught with the cell phone in him. Just look up “x-ray turns up cell phone”.
Anyways. Still no word on my case, though several recent rulings out of America’s top court, The United States Supreme Court, are helpful to my case! So that is good. I haven’t smashed on the system so much lately, as well, to be honest I am nervous to. 🙂 I ain’t trying to piss anyone off as far as judges and etc. c/s. But there is a case out of Pennsylvania. Two judges there was removed from the bench for sending kids to juvenile prison camps for profit. They was getting paid and it’s said, made millions off of sending hundreds of kids to prison camps for kids. They fucked off all them kids lives for some money. Now in America we look at judges as “THE LAW”. A judge is the closest thing to a dictator America has. After all, it was the court that decided the election of Bush and Gore. Now it’s not fair to look at judges themselves in a negative manner. But they are human just as lawyers and prosecutors are. Most judges, if not all, are defense lawyers or prosecutors before they become a judge. A lot of defense lawyers started out as prosecutors, which can be good training experience. One judge was in the news for using a penis pump while sitting on the bench conducting court! 🙂 I swear! People would hear a weird pumping noise and no one could figure it out until an assistant stumbled across the penis pump. (To those not knowing what that is, it’s a cylinder that a guy put’s on him and squeezes a pump. It is supposed to help increase size.) I mean that is out there! I just can’t imagine some old judge sitting on the bench during court using one of these! 🙂 Hahaha Damn it! Another judge in El Paso Texas was recently removed from office by the U.S. Marshal for some sex offense. Like using his capacity as a judge to try to gain sexual favors. There was even an article in Newsweek recently titled “when judges go bad”. (“I wanna know” by Joe is on the radio. That’s one of my favorite R&B love songs. Though I am not really in the mood to be listening to songs like that.)
Anyways. As for my d.v.d, well as of my last visit with my sister Christy, she reported that the other videos to be placed on it was received by her and sent to Vera so that the d.v.d can FINALLY get finished. To be honest, several times I have thought about saying to hell with it and cancel the damn thing. Two freaking years I been trying to get the thing done!! 🙁 I am not holding my breath that is for damn sure. Vera has had the cases and design ready, just not the videos. Now that she has them, hopefully finally all will be done. There was much more I could have added to the book part. I actually thought about doing that. But due to all the delays, I just want to get it done. I will have the other parts that I was going to add posted on my website. Part of the reason I didn’t put all on the disk, is I wanted to encourage those that order the disk that haven’t seen my site to actually visit it and read all my blogs and etc. This way they can read up on my case and etc.
Oh yeah Louise Driver, hey I got your letter but I can’t make out the complete address! I can’t find your original e-mail that had the address, so please send me your address, so I can get this letter mailed to you! Thanks!
Next subject. Music. I have mentioned songs several times here. I can actually recall the exact moment I heard some of my favorite songs. When I was a kid I was at my aunt Pam’s house with my dad, sister and twin brothers as well as an assortment of other relatives from my dads side of the family. Well of my brothers, (Dino and Dano, no lie that’s their names. :). ) I always felt closer to Dino. He was always considered the compassionate one. Dano was the asshole. Me and him have had a rocky past few years due to his testimony against me. He had no facts on the murders, but the fact is he got on the stand for the prosecution. I always felt it was because he didn’t want to go back to jail and risk loosing this trash he was with at the time. She is the one that Amber’s statement makes mention of her kids. Anyways. No D.A could ever get me on the stand. c/s Back to the point. My dad had his truck radio blaring. I was messing around with one of my cousins or something when ‘Bad to the Bone’ by George Thurgood came on the radio. Dino yelled out, “Bubba there’s your song!” so I just took off running and climbed up into my dads truck cab and twisted my head towards the speakers and just listened to each word. Afterwards I just smiled from ear to ear. 🙂 ha Somehow I think that song had an impact on me. 🙂 ha A few years later while in the garage with my step father during the winter working on something. I can’t exactly recall what but I do recall bending over using a grinder on some assortment of metal, when ‘Shooting Star’ by Bad Company came over the radio. I stood up staring at the radio, listening to the song play. I actually never knew who sang it until I got here!. The same sort of situation played out to ‘Simple Man’ by Lynard Skynard. But that day I even remember what I was wearing and the way I was standing. As the radio was to my left when Bad Company came on, but it was on my right when Simple Man came on. (different ways of course.) The radio never moved until my step dad got rid of that garage and it always stayed on the classic rock station. Now I am sure I heard these songs some other time, but they never registered. I mean I actually froze while listening to the song! I do got a unnatural ability to remember things in detail, but it always amazed me that I can recall the exact moment where I heard so many songs. I was sitting in front of the t.v watching MTV in Gillette Wyoming when “Runaway Train” by Soul asylum came on. I was 9! When I came back to Wyoming, I was walking around the trailer park where my dad lived with his girlfriend, her daughter and my sister Christy, when a guy was working on his radio. He was putting some house speakers into his car and was trying to get them wired up. He was listening to “Entersandman” by Metallica. First time I ever heard it. Sometimes I like a song for the lyrics, sometimes for the beat or the voice. My favorite female singer as far as lyrics and just her nature is Miranda Lambert. As far as voice is by far Sugarland, with songs like “Stay”, “Come Home Soon” and etc. Well I’m not sure if she sings ‘Come Home Soon’. I haven’t heard it in so long. But “Stay” is better, as it’s mainly just her voice. Reba McIntire (not sure how to spell her last name) but I like the country twang in her voice. A pair of OLD songs that always make me tear up is “Giddy up go” and “Teddy Bear”. Both are by Reo Sovine. I am just guessing on the spelling of his last name but it sounds like Soulfine when they say it on the radio. The songs are from the late 60’s, early 70’s. Way before I was born. 🙂 But if you can listen to those songs and NOT have to wipe your eyes, something ain’t right with ya. Anyways, I had listed some songs I like to a friend and she pointed out that I like mainly the lyrics of songs. I never even thought about it. But she is pretty much right. I often wonder if my favorite songs are a reflection of my psyche. I mean, I do like songs based on some sort of
manner that I can attach my self to it. Just like with the song “Dear Momma” by Tupac. Those that don’t know, he’s a dead rapper. Now parts of that song don’t apply, but lots do. The basic theme of it did. I mean my mom wasn’t a crack fiend, not black and never been on welfare! But other than that it’s on point in most areas. One thing I noticed is that “Dear Momma”, “Simple Man” and “Shooting Star” all involve a guy and his mom. When I was younger my mom was always the most important person in my life. So I figure that is what made those songs stand out so much.
A side Note. My next few articles are going to be longer then average as I am going to tie in parts that I was going to put in my book. Life story stuff, favorite books, music and such. I know Brandi, Regina and Christy are going to be cussing me out at all the typing they are going to be doing. 🙂 haha
As I said, my sister Christy came to see me last week. Had a good visit! I just got alot on my mind lately. Stress through the roof! A highlight was that she mentioned one of my ex-girlfriends that had located me. A girl I was with when I lived in North Carolina with my dad and Christy. This of course brought up all kinds of stories and people that Christy and I knew. I tried to be 10 years older then I was, so I associated with older people. Which is how me and Christy knew the same people. I thought it was pretty neat that Randi had located me, as like three or four days before I had my visit with Christy, I was talking about childhood war stories with my friend. We was talking about ex-girlfriends, wild nights and the sort. He had mentioned some event that made me tell a story, one of those, “man that reminds me of the time”, kind of stories. He mentioned some girl that was crazy or something. I think the base of our stories was about girls that hit dudes. As the story I told about Randi, was the time I was just out of my mind drunk in a motel room. Well when she came in the room it was just me and two girls. So I know how it might have looked to her, but it just so happened that all the other dudes that was in the room had went outside. One of those “perfect storms” kind of moments. Well she didnt like me drinking. There was personal reasons that have to do with another person. Anyways. There I was in a chair just toasted and she came in the room calling my name. I opened my eyes and all I could see was a “Myrtle Beach” t-shirt with a smile face calling my name. So I replied. “Who the hell are you!?” Hey I thought the smile face was calling me! Well as soon as I said that BAM! she hit me. After she hit me, I shook my head, look up and said “Oh hey Randi!” She then grabbed me by my hair and I guess you could say she helped me out of the motel room. 🙂 haha I of course repeated that same story and many others while visiting Christy. I just thought it was neat as I’ve been reading this book, “The Secret” and it talks about how things get willed into exisitence. So it was neat, I was talking about her and then she pops up. All the memories that came flooding back! I used to get out of school and would walk her home along with a couple of school friends. If I wasn’t at her dads house, I was at the Food Lion near my homeboy Robert’s house. Well, minutes before five I would take off running home. Thats it! Me and my friend here was talking about running as a kid and that led to stories about old girlfriends and etc. Anyways. It amazes me now thinking back on it how I could run at full speed from the Food Lion to my dads house. That had to be a good two miles! It was the Food Lion in Kannapolis North Carolina. My dads house was right off North Cannon Blvd. across from the KFC. So if all that is still in the same place, I guess google maps could tell the distance. The road I ran went right in front of AL Brown high school. Anyways, I would run in the house, jump on the couch and then a couple minutes later my dad would walk in the door. O of course acted like I been there the whole time. 🙂 haha That made me just think about the arguments my sister Christy and I used to have. 🙂 ha I remember one time she told me to ‘shut up’ as I kept saying some assorted word or another that was cool or I thought to be at the time. 😉 Well she started going off on me, so I replied. “Yo chill out, your crimping my style.” she responded with, “You ain’t got no style, your a dumb ass!” 😉 haha! God ya gotta love older sisters! While there were many highlights in my life at that point, there was many dark moments as well. My relationship with my father started getting even more chaotic. I was associating with older more aggressive people. So I of course picked up personality traits, well my dad was an abusive person. So I was getting to the point to where I was getting tired of being a victim. Then the event took place where my dad beat me with the 2×4 board. (a two inch thick by two inch wide board.) All because of a school prank. That single event had a profound effect on me. The next time he put his hands on me, I fought back. I didn’t see him again until I was 17. I tried to tell myself, “I only got one dad, he only knows how to do what his dad done to him.” but that event always popped into my head. I was working with him. Well that didn’t last long at all. He fired me on my day off, over an argument I got into with Dano’s girlfriend! That’s just the kind of idiot my dad was. Well I was mad and he had been drinking, so I popped off and said something and somehow my mom got brought up and he called my mom a bitch. So I jumped to my feet and said “Don’t talk about my mom like that”. So he got up and I started towards him. I mumbled, “I ain’t a kid no more”. So he started towards me and he made some comment about ” O so you wanna be a tough guy”. I just stopped and walked away and yelled “Man fuck you!”. I really wanted to just beat his ass that day! My dad while older, wasn’t weak. But I was worried about killing him. I didn’t feel like going back to jail. He had had two heart attacks by this point, so when I started towards him I thought “man I’m gonna beat his ass and he’s gonna have a heart attack, then I’m going to end up back in jail.” So I just walked away. After that I rode back with him and my brother and his chick to East Texas. I didn’t say a word really on the way back. I left my oldest sister’s wedding with Dino and Dano and went and got my car, came back to watch my sister get married and then I left. I didn’t see my dad or sister’s again until court on this case.
Back to North Carolina. Well during this time I was dealing with the events of my dad and was facing a turning point in my life. Plus I was not taking the A.D.H.D meds I had been ,as a kid, taking for years. So when I ended up back at my mom’s, here in Texas, I wasn’t trying to hear what my step father was talking about, or my mom for that matter. I ran away a few times and then ended up beginning my journey through the juvenile system. I think really, I just became aware! When my dad done what he done with that board, I became aware that I had been a victim far too many times. The shit I dealt with from my step dad and my real father. I just became aware of it all. I think my mom caught some of the blame as she’s the one that had me with my father and she was the one married to my step dad. That’s how I looked at it. She no longer could control me which is how I ended up in the placement which led me going to T.Y.C. The prosecutor tries to use my juvenile record against me. Well what they never pointed out, it was my own mom that got me sent to juvenile, because there’s no way she could have controlled me. And to be honest I wasn’t even mad when she took me to the police station. As we were on our way back from Louisiana where I had just been arrested in a stolen car with two others. Me and another kid took his step mom’s car, along with my girlfriend at that
time, Tasha. Well my step dad told my mom to do something with me, but not to bring me back home. When she told me this, it only set me off even more. My thinking was, okay make HIS ass leave! Well by the time we got to the police station, I had told her I would rather be locked up then live with them. I even tried to jump out of the truck. I told the cop, when he told me they was taking me to juvenile, ‘I don’t give a shit!’. Well after two weeks of being locked in that damn cell, I changed my mind and wanted to go home. 🙂 ha. Something about jail sure does make that happen. I was doing good. Everything was alright on the home front, until two dudes I was with broke into a neighbor’s house. I stayed outside. I didn’t go in the house, as my probation officer told me I was going to go to T.Y.C if I got into anymore trouble. Well the IDIOTS I was with showed their mom the stuff they stole or something like that. My mom found out and somehow or another a cop ended up at my house. I ended up going to juvenile lock up for that. I was riding in the cop car and the cop told me, “your buddies blamed you for everything.” I said “yeah that’s what you all say!”. Well the cop replied “No. I am serious. I am not trying to get you to snitch. Your buddies really did blame everything on you!”. So I just said, “well, who had the most stuff?” and we took the rest of the trip in silence. That was Dec. 15, 1997. I will get into my journey through the juvenile system in greater detail in another article. This one is getting too long! 🙂 A side note is that every time I got in trouble with others, I always ended up being the only one that didn’t say anything! So who get’s the worse of the deal? Your’s truly!
This article has covered shake down’s, ex-girlfriend’s, favorite song’s, juvenile chaos and child abuse. Needless to say, it’s been all over the place. It’s kind of like me I guess. I just go with the flow and adjust as it comes at me. I didn’t mean to sit down and make this as long as I did. But when I started, I just got in the mood to keep going. O well. Anyways, I need to wrap this up so I can get some letters ready to go out. Tune in next week. I leave as I came. Peace out!
Clinton Young #999447
3872 FM 350 South
Livingston TX 77351
Copyright © 2009 by Clinton Lee Young. All rights reserved